June 3rd, 2019
Two days ago, I had a tutoring session with a young man who is not getting around in search for a job despite the fact that the summer season is already well under way. We have made work plans, job hunting plans, worked with web portals, tools, channels, we have updated his CV… but he does not feel the impulse to go out and be proactive in order to hand in CVs and present his application.
We have had many tutorials because, as a professional, I detect that there is something preventing him from going out and looking for a job. At our last meeting, we made a list of everything we thought was preventing him from
leaving the house. He told me:
“I wake up and I have my computer here… my house traps me, my room is my temple and I feel much better inside than outside the house”.
We made a list of all the obstacles and resistance that he detected, while, at the same time, to counteract this, we made a list of the motivations he had to find a job. He was telling me:
“I want to help at home, I want to have money to pay for my driving license, I want to feel useful…”.
This second list helped us reflect on which things he could use to combat “how good I feel at home” and have the initiative to go out and find a job.
I try to adapt a lot when mentoring, and if I feel like the situation requires it, I don’t do the tutorials in a formal space, but in a more informal space or during a walk. This allows them to breathe, connect with the present and relativise their concerns.